Welcome, formerly known as 'Salford Swim Swim'. This is a Manchester blog about running and swimming and random stuff. Oh and mental health, it is good to be mentally healthy. Which we of course are not.......so if you're not too then check this out.........Moodswings

Friday, 28 March 2014

The Salford Triathlon 2013 - the results

It's taken me 8 months to put this post up but I thought I better let people know that we did do the Salford Triathlon and didn't just float away in some terrible accident in the canal. I haven't felt much up to blogging but a lovely lady suggested I have a crack at it to fill my time again.

The day was actually brilliant, the sun was shining, the crowd were great and much to our surprise we got around the course. Nick didn't drown, I didn't have to surgically remove my bike saddle from my cervix and a jolly good time was had by all.

There were some stressful bits. I put my finger through my swimming cap about 30 seconds before the start of the swim (yes I'm a dick). And had to run and get another one, just in the nick of time ha Nick of time! Get it, cause my cousins called Nick, I'm hilarious.

That wasn't embarrassing, it also definitely wasn't embarrassing to be the only swimmer with a bright red cap on when the others all had gold on. Bit like when you see blood in your wee.

So that posed another problem. My friends and family therefore could recognise me in the the water and follow me around shouting a combination of abuse and positive messages.

To make matters worse I had (in my wisdom) decided to try and start at the front because in previous swims Kath and I had gone to the back and spent a considerable time swimming around people with the ship width of a cross channel ferry. What a smart idea I thought posed and ready to go, what I hadn't taken into consideration was that in previous swims any shape and size could enter, this was a f@cking triathlon and only freaky protein hyped up sport animals enter.

So yeah, what do you think happened? They swam over my head, kicked me in the face. Created mini tidal waves, rip current and probably did that whilst weeing on me on the way past. There wasn't even more than one lap but I am pretty sure they lapped me.

My only consolidation was to know no matter how crap I was comparatively to these person there would be at least one person slower than me.......Nick Ward.

Nick did phenomenally well and despite all odds managed to not only stay afloat but swim. Much of which he attributes to the buoyancy of the wetsuit.

As for the bike bit, well lets just say Salford isn't as flat as you would think. This was confirmed to me by many other riders who in raspy voice would shout "I thought there wasn't any f@cking hills on this course".

The run was tolerable, all the other peeps were really friendly and egging each other on. I overtook a muscly man and felt pretty good about it and then he said something really nice to me and I hated myself for my evil overtaker snigger.

Nick had a very good run, in fact he fricking aced it. But the less said about that the better.

So here are the results, I am a wonderful loser so totally took this in my stride.

Sam  - 1 hr 44 mins 22 secs
Swim 18:32
Bike 51:12
Run 28:32

Dick - 1 hr 41mins 58 secs
Swim 20:03
Bike 49:13
Run 25:56

It's fine, I'm over it.

The best bit was seeing my lovely Mum wearing the medal (see photo above). She couldn't talk and was using a wheelchair but she told us she was proud as punch by writing in her little notebook. We raised loads of money and had a smashing day. I would run a million triathlons, move the sun and the stars to stop MND in its tracks.

Thanks for all your support and donations

Sam xxx


Saturday, 17 August 2013

Ready to rock

Just setting up for tomorrow. We're heading to the Quays to register and rack our bikes up. 

Not sure where the kitten is going to fit on the bike but i'll find some space for him.

If the little shit tries to bite one more hole in my wetsuit i'm going to turn him into a scarf.

Friday, 16 August 2013

Sponsor us folks, I don't do this thing for free

Alright, I have been lacking in the blogging department.

Well there is good reason for that and I feel the need to explain:

Motor Neurone Disease is really shitty and I haven't always been in the mood. I write like my mood and I don't want to depress you folks. I don't believe in sharing the misery.

This is my Ma, she is very spesh and not just to me. She has looked after loads of people over the years, my friends, my cousins. She deserves some looking after now too.

I have been spending an inordinate amount of time travelling back and forth to the gym, training, washing, training and then eating. Most of which whilst an unbearable stink has been kicking off me.

It's a kind of stink you can't wash off, it needs to be soaked off before you top it up with another litre or so of sweat.

I barely have enough energy to brush my teeth or stroke the cat. So blogging wasn't top of the list.

So in light of this I would like some money off you, if you have ever read and enjoyed this blog why don't you consider giving something back. Even if it's just a quid or something.

You can sponsor us here or text a £1/ £2/ £5 by texting TOLL81 with the amount to 70070 

My cousin (Nick) and I are entered in the Salford Triathlon on Sunday and we are doing it to raise funds for the MND association. I cannot express how important this charity is, they are pretty much the only ones funding research to combat MND, for which there is NO cure.

Why you should sponsor us.........

I had to buy anti-chaffing gel, yahuh. My thighs rub up on each other a lot and not in a sexy way either.

Nick cannot swim, it would be funny if it wasn't so tragic. Who signs up for a tri when they can't swim. Silly Ward boy.

I had to witness my cousin head to toe in rubber on Sunday. There is no dignity in a wetsuit, I hope Sunday will be the last time I put one on and certainly the last time I have to look at Nick in one. I am sure the feeling is mutual.

Nick and I, As you can see I have been working hard preparing for the bike leg of the tri and Nick has been eating my dust (far left)

It's important, do you want to know how crap MND really is? My Mum has now had to be fitted with a feeding tube as the muscles in her throat are so weak she can't process or move food. She mostly can't walk now and uses a wheelchair and has lost her speech completely.

My Mum is a terribly dignified lady and is taking this horror better than anyone ever should. You think you are having a bad day, you know nothing.

Do something good, sponsor us or at the very least take a minute to find out what MND is to help raise its awareness and sign the charter.

The greater the awareness, the greater to effort to help fight it! It is not as uncommon as you think. I have been devastated to learn how many people I know (even in my own office) who have been affected by MND.

I hope it never happens to you x



Saturday, 3 August 2013

Let the belly run free

This is pretty much how I roll at the moment. I spend a considerable amount time sliming about in my own perspiration. Yesterday it was exceptionally hot but because the gym was empty i was able to let my belly run free like a fat kid in a sweet shop. Except probably not as muscly; it kind of looked more like milky jelly on a spin cycle. 

I am practically a nudist now. 

It was pretty liberating letting it hang out, sweat pooled down my belly as walked about. It was like a Woodstock type experience; though I think I grossed out a couple of fancy women on a spa day when I walked into the changing room and left a little sweat puddle near their towelling robes.

I had even completed a number of yogic stretches sans t-shirt, though I felt less empowered when I had to tuck a rather loose part of tummy flesh into my running tights in order to stop it getting friction burns on the floor.

I need to become one with this type of flesh exposure. There will be a part of the tri transition where it will just be me, the sports bra and a pair of rather flattering tri shorts with nappy style bike cushioning in the ass.

Tri training is taxing no? In 2 weeks we will have nailed it. I'm a little worried my cousin will drown cause he's just worked out he can't swim, and I have my concerns about staying on a bike for 20km without tangling myself in the chain, or suffocating in my wetsuit from transition. 

Getting out of a wetsuit is like peeling out of a body suit made of dried pva glue. It's an undignified practice. I can't do it very well standing up or sitting down so how I'm going to manage it whilst running for a bike I'll never know. 

If you want to donate some funds towards our tri plight in aid of the MNDA you can at the link at the top right hand side of this page. 

Peace out

Sam xxx

Thursday, 4 July 2013

When you get one bum cheek bigger than the other, zombies & frazzles

I am some what delicate today.

Please note I am Sam - not Kath - this will save confusion when you read on. Kath doesn't drink & hasn't fallen off any wagons. 

Drinking booze after exercise is a terrible, terrible idea and anyone who dares to do it will be punished with a plague. My dehydrated body just soaked up red wine like spongebob and has left me with a quivering shell. I am spending a lot of time wishing that furniture around me will morph into a mattress with an endless supply of diet coke and frazzle crisps.

I went to body combat last night and its left me with an arse injury, well half an arse injury because I seemingly have only over exerted one of my buttocks (the right one). Every time I stand up I am leaning one side.

This plus the agony of a hangover makes me look like an extra from the 'walking dead'.

This is me, except I have a bum and it hurts. I wonder if she has phantom bum pain. Though that would mean that Zombies could feel pain which I suspect they can't but then they do moan a lot, so who knows.

I have some serious concerns that one of my 'cheeks' will become rounder and more overly developed than the other and then people will point or maybe even try to rest their drinks on it in bars. How will I find underwear? So many implications, I can't see there being any benefits to it.

Must work harder on the 'left'.

I think I am going to the Spar to get some frazzles, or some salt & vinegar discos. Yes, that is what I shall do.

Bye then

oh, and thank you again for all your kind and support re: the triathlon. And your money, that has been brilliant too!


Tuesday, 2 July 2013

The importance of balance & remaining calm and not punching people full on in the snot box

Well howdy

I would just like to extend you folks some firm handed 'high fives' for all your sponsorship.

I am incredibly moved by your generosity. And I have blurted a few eye spits over all the donations i have received from colleagues at the university that I have never met.

You people rock in a cool and non ironic manner.

So. I feel it my duty to update you all on my progress. Training is going well, suspiciously so in fact. So well, I just don't trust it. Any moment now something is going to break or fall off.

Life/work/exercise balance is going super shit. I am writing this whilst stirring a dirty pasta pack and trying to amuse a neglected and demanding Burmese kitten. I don't know how people do this and have children, I salute you, you insane, masochistic beings. Bravo.

It's 9 o'clock and I am inches away from sitting on the kitchen floor with a spoon and a tub of utterly butterly. 

But let me update you on what your money is forcing me to do. Last night I did what is called a 'brick' session, aptly called so I think because after it you feel like someone has taken a brick and smashed it over and over again all over your body. Or maybe its called 'brick' because you want to brick yourself to death after it. Who the feck knows.

So last night - 40 mins cycling, high reps then slow reps, then straight onto the treadmill for 30 min run (5km), then followed by 20 mins of weight lifting.

Tonight, 30 min semi-hard (maha) cycle followed by an immediate 30 min run and a 15 min easy swim. As well as a 20 min ride to work and a 20 min ride back from the gym when some audi man thought it oh so hilarious to super splash me, but I got my own back cause I thought dead mean thoughts about him, including wishing his ability to maintain an erection is diminished and that a bird poos on his face. Not my best work but i just don't have time at the moment to think of any more suitable fantastical punishments.

Now I am going to go because I have to try and fit sleep in and in order to fight all the adrenalin pumping through my body, I am going to mash a couple of nytol into a red wine and then suck it through a straw*

*don't do this without consulting with your doctor first.

Bye peeps

Sam x

Thursday, 27 June 2013

I'm famous (on our work staffnet)

A very lovely lady called Mik has written a little article on my Mum's story for work to try and help funds.

I don't think just any pleb can read it as it's internal but I thought I would copy it out for you guys, also my fundraising page is now up and ready to receive cash like Taylor Swift is to receive boys into her bed.

Click on my Ma's cheeky little face to get to the link... or here......



Here's the article it all it's glory..........thanks Mik xxx

Sam raises charity cash for the love of Mum

27 Jun 2013

Disability Support Adviser Sam Ward is taking part in the Salford Sprint Triathlon to raise money for the Motor Neurone Disease Association in honour of her mother, who was diagnosed with the devastating degenerative disease this year.

Motor Neurone Disease (MND) is an incurable disease that attacks the nerves in the brain and spinal cord. Messages gradually stop reaching muscles, which leads to weakness and wasting and patients suffering difficulties with speech, swallowing and breathing.
It a rare disease, with around two people in every 100,000 diagnosed every year. But in the UK around 5,000 people have MND at any one time and it kills five people every day.

June is MND Awareness Month and Sam wants colleagues to sign the MND Charter to raise awareness and lobby for more funding and support for the under-resourced condition, and also sponsor her in the triathlon in August and future events if they can.

Sam’s mum Pauline “Toll” Ward was diagnosed in February, after suffering symptoms for a year and undergoing a battery of tests.

“We were heartbroken – it’s a really, really horrible disease,” Sam recalls.

“She has already lost most of her voice and now her mobility also, she will use a wheelchair now when not at home.

“But my Mum is an amazing, positive woman and she is facing this with such dignity. Last week she was outside Ikea with my Dad – she couldn’t talk but she was holding the MNDA collection tin while he did the talking.”

In fact, this is only the latest in a series of fundraising challenges for a variety of causes by Sam – and it was her Mum’s battle with cancer that started her off.

“Mum survived renal cancer in 2003 and, after her operation, she did a Walk for Life to raise money for cancer research,” Sam says.

“As I was cheering her on, I thought ‘what am I doing here?’ So I signed up for a 5k charity run, then 10k and other events. I have raised £3,500 since 2006.”

Sam – who takes part in fundraising events with her DSO colleague Kath Henderson, recording it all in their witty blog – adds: “This charity means even more to me.

“The condition is really under-resourced so we don’t what causes it and have no cure, but one day, with funding, researchers might get there.

“And the South Lancashire branch of the MNDA has been a wonderful support to my family. It’s a postcode lottery in terms of support for MNDA – it’s devastating as it is but without their support, it would have been so much worse. I want to thank them for all they have done for us.”

Wednesday, 19 June 2013

Salford Triathlon - it's on people

I'm back.

I have been busy, not blogging and triathlon training. But I have signed up for the Salford Triathlon (sprint) so there is no sticking my head in the poopy sandpit anymore, I cannot pretend this is not happening.

It sucks so very much but I need to raise cash for the super wonderful Motor Neurone Disease Association. I want to pay back some of the good they have done for my lovely mum.

So, you can all start tuning into the blog again. Join me on my journey of pain, suspect rashes, hardened skin and misery.

Kath may or may not be joining me, she has done some serious damage to her bottom area *insert rude comment here*, so her future is uncertain.

Au revoir


Tuesday, 7 May 2013

Kath's Guide to Marathon Running

1) Think about it first. Decide on an event far in the future so you have plenty of time to train, even if it snows all the sodding time. Do not just win a place in a competition with 10 weeks to go.

2) Build your distance up slowly, or you will be unable to stand up or sit down without making old people noises.

3) Do your longest run twice, even though your plan only says once. This advice was given to me by a sports masseur who had run 120 marathons, 47 of them in different countries. He was right. I did my first 20 mile run on ice, with a massive freezing headwind. It was so awful it was funny. The second 20 mile run was an absolute doddle after that, and knowing I'd managed it twice gave me some confidence in believing I'd be able to finish. This was crucial, given that a massive proportion of running is in the mind.

4) Do not use the start of the Marathon as an opportunity to learn how to wee standing up through a cardboard funnel. You do not want to run 26 miles covered in piss.

5) Take Imodium before the off. Running and nerves are a powerful combination, and there are way too many pictures on the Internet of people who have not followed this advice. It is not a good look.

6) Try and get your estimate of your finish time as accurate as possible. I don't know what I said I expected, but I was in pen 8 of 9 at the start. I looked like I was the only one who hadn't got the fancy dress instruction on the invitation, and really struggled to move at my own pace throughout the run.

7) High five as many kids/drunk cockneys as you can. High fiving while running is one of the best feelings in the world.

8) Expect people to do odd things that are not necessarily conducive to running. There will be a story behind how everyone ended up running that race, that day, and they may want to wear a ridulous costume, record their thoughts on a dictaphone, text their Mum or film their sweaty face while running for posterity. The winter evenings must simply fly by watching that footage.

9) Don't believe anyone who says "The crowd will pull you through the last bit". I was thoroughly fed up of the crowd shouting at me by about mile 19. I wanted them all to go home and leave me alone to suffer in peace.

10) Remember the last mile is always the worst, when you think it will never, ever end.....but it's all worth it for that first step over the finish line. Even if it is a bit wobbly.

Cheers to everyone for their support of MOODSWINGS You can still send a donation to them here.

And, of course, massive thanks to parkrun and Lucozade Sport for their amazing prize. I will probably forgive you one day....



Friday, 3 May 2013

Haruki Murakami - What I talk about when I talk about running

While Kath is taking her time to put up her marathon photos I thought I would throw a filler in.

If you don't know about Haruki Murakami here is your chance. He is so incredibly smart and a bit of a genius hero man, not only has he translated a number of literary classics into Japanese (The Great Gatsby and Breakfast at Tiffany's to name a few) but he's also a great novelist and mega runner.

I would highly recommend 'Norwegian Wood' but also this, 'What I talk about when I talk about running'. How he has managed to write a book about running and not make it boring, I don't know.

The dude runs ultra marathons and triathlons for FFS.

I just love the way he writes, and if you like running and books then this one is for you. Not to mention the cover art is aces. Of course having a Japanese novelist in your book case is also going to make you look tres sophisticated and cultured. I make a point of having his books at eye level to detract from my shameful Twilight and Spike Milligan collection which kind of makes me look a little stupid and juvenile.

 I'm off on holiday today so I am going to leave it to Kath to tell you about the marathon. PULL YOUR FINGER OUT KATH - we have been getting requests (albeit one but nevertheless).

Sunday, 21 April 2013

London Marathon 2013 - Good luck Kath you fool

Today is Kath's big day, as I write this from my toasty bed with my little kitten snoring next to me this in no way a euphemism, I actually have a Burmese kitten Kath will be shuffling along with 35,000 others in the start of the London Marathon.

The start of the race is the worst, for one you're shitting yourself, your heart starts beating faster. Nervous tension takes over and despite 50 priors wee's you will undoubtedly get a sudden urge to use the toilet - either for a non existent wee (because you expelled any liquid from your body in the previous 50 urinations) or because you're about to experience nervous diarrhoea.

You're usually freezing and fall victim to the flimsiness of your breathable clothes and your forced to engage in small talk with all the other folks around you.  Something that Kath will hate.

Race starts pretty much resemble a EDL rally being kettled into a pig pen.  I haven't been in one race yet where someone hasn't farted.

Despite this, when the gun goes off and you start shuffling along with thousands of others there is a sudden rush of adrenaline that tells you 'this is it, this is what I've been training for'. That feeling is hard to beat and despite my jibes I am so jealous of Kath right now.

Kath is one of the most inspirational people I know. She has trained for this marathon with little warning and has done so with the same determination she used to give up drinking.  26.2 miles is a bloody long way and every mile she runs she will do with Moodswings in mind.

If you want to read Kath's story you can do in this blog and if you want to donate you can do here...

I can't write this without a little mention of my other pal Sarah Leech, little Leechie only has short legs and she has been busting a gut training to raise funds for the Christie Cancer Hospital in Manchester. Her dedication is no less impressive that Kath's, she's a quiet little hero but a hero nevertheless.

Well done Leechie, I am tremendously proud of you.

You can read Sarah's story here, if you can throw her some money she would appreciate it -

Good luck birds, I am thinking of you both and if Kath didn't have a text from me saved in her phone (saying I will never do a marathon) I would have been there with you.

One of these days I am going to get all my gammy limbs fixed so I can run that frigging race.

Big hugs out to Boston as well, it seems wrong not thinking of them today. Don't pick on marathon runners, they are the strongest people going.

Peace out

Sammy  xxxx

on second thoughts I take it all back, I'm staying in bed with this chap..

Friday, 19 April 2013

Team Lucozade

So I'm getting ready to go to London to be part of Team Lucozade Sport (or procastinating about getting ready, which is almost the same thing).

I should mention that Lucozade Sport have been sending me lots of free stuff to get me through the training. In fact I've been living off their products for some time now.

I've been using the gels and drinks when I've done longer runs to get used to them for The Run Itself. The gels taste of undiluted orange squash which reminds me of vodka and orange and is therefore really quite exciting. I've no idea if they actually give you an energy boost, but there's the possibility they might have done and that helps.

They've also sent me a London Marathon running top which is really super comfy for running in. I could be tempted by more of this Adidas Supernova stuff if I had a running stuff shopping obsession which obviously I don't.

Sam needs to get used to this view for the future

People should see me coming anyway. Or if they don't, they'll certainly see me leave.


Tuesday, 16 April 2013

Monday, 15 April 2013

The Joys of Running

Still reeling from my, erm, good fortune at winning a place on the London Marathon I set about training for the big day. 

I couldn’t find any plans that recommended training for a marathon in 10 weeks. The majority suggested, really quite firmly, that you needed 14 weeks. Myasics.com reckoned it was possible in 12 weeks, provided you didn’t do anything really silly like starting two weeks in, so I went with that one and started two weeks in.  

Fortunately I was really well prepared, having spent the winter Internet shopping for running stuff that Sam had told me I didn’t need. All I had to do now was get out there and try to remember what I love about running.

Things I do not love about running

Bloody hell it hurts. Every step.

Two main things really.

One - they drive from miles around to turn down side streets that no one has driven down for literally months, just as I need to cross, every fricking time. This means stopping. Stopping running is not a good plan. You realise exactly how much it all hurts when it stops.

Two – when it is dark they come and park right on the pavement at breakneck speed. This is unexpected, what the pavement having been built for pedestrians, and not as a carpark.

I hold my hands up – I ride a bike myself. And when I’m on a bike I obviously hate runners, it's the law. What I do not do is ride in a vague zigzag along the pavement. Texting. I also do not go up the side of a lane of traffic, jump a red light and then shout abuse at a runner crossing the road. Just saying.

Mo Farah doesn't have to put up with this nonsense

I’m sure your dog is very friendly, and it’s really cute that it bounds over to say hello. It doesn’t matter at all that it’s baring its teeth at me, nor that it has tried to trip me over, twice, and those muddy pawprints look great on my new compression tights. I can darn the hole. Oh good, it’s coming back to do the same again. Put it on a lead seeing as it doesn’t do one thing you say? Oh no, surely not.

Beauty Spots
There are miles and miles of pathways pretty much from my door, going across the Greater Manchester conurbation in all directions. The number of places I can get to, off road, is staggering. The scenery is spectacular, and I'm forever finding new places (OK, so I get lost. Often.) So why does everyone from a ten mile radius need to congregate at one particular place and stay within a mile of the car just because there are a few ducks and an ice cream van? That is not a day out in the countryside. You might as well go to the Trafford Centre.



Sunday, 14 April 2013

It's Good to Talk

I was just at work trying to work out what Sam was singing this time and wishing she’d stop, when my mobile went. An unknown number. Clearly one of the kids was in trouble. Again.

Mentally working out the train times, telling my boss I had to go and putting my coat on I answered in my best I Am a Responsible Mother At All Times Even When I Am At Work Voice. Some chap started talking. “Blah, blah, blah sports” he said. 

Not the kids then. They don’t do sport. Must be something I’ve ordered online. Something completely essential that I can’t quite remember ordering. I should probably cancel it while I’ve got him on the phone.

Then he mentioned parkrun, and I started listening. He was talking about the Lucozade Sports “Chase the Place” competition they’d had at the end of last year. To enter you had to participate in the last 6 parkruns of 2012. 

Coincidentally at much the same time I realised I’d done 43 parkruns and, if I did all the intervening runs, I’d run my 50th on New Year’s Day. The Big 50 is a big deal in parkrun – you get a T-shirt with 50 on it and a sense of belonging to something amazing and a huge dash of smugness particularly on New Year’s Day when everyone else is in bed with a hangover. I have been known to get a bit obsessive about things like that (occasions, not T-shirts) so there was really never any doubt that I would run these particular six runs.  

The prize was a place in the London Marathon, and the Man From Lucozade Sports was ringing to say I’d won! 

I got off the phone. Sam was doing her “Kath’s got to do a Marathon” dance round the office. The news started to sink in. I was currently running 3 miles three or four times a week. I now had to get so I could run 26.2 miles, all in one go, in ten weeks. 

Oh bother.



Tuesday, 2 April 2013


Skinny tomato and roasted aubergine soup recipe

Skinny tomato and roasted aubergine soup recipe

........because I am recovering from an operation I haven't been allowed to do any exercise (though I did go on the exercise bike at the gym and then got told off by Kath but she ain't the boss of me. Well technically she is but whatever).

So I was a  bit scared of getting fat whilst I was recuperating*.

 *watching 'This Morning' and other such television shite.

Therefore, I decided to embark on a healthy eating slash calorie controlled misery to prevent myself from getting so fat that they would have to remove my bedroom window just to get me out of the house to go to work.

And it has worked, I am half a stone lighter and this is going to help me smash Kath into the ground come August when we triathonathonalanon or whatever the word is.

So here is a little low fat soup recipe I botched together. I worked out on my fitness pal (app) that per serving it's about 128 calories per serving but you can probably get this down some more if you use fry light to sweat your onions.

Yabba, yabba - here is the recipe already.


1 can of peeled plum tomatoes (I used Morrisons Italian plum)
1 onion
1/3 aubergine (chopped into cubes)
1 garlic clove
1 vegetable stock cube
Pinch of chilli
Pinch of cumin
1 tsp sunflower oil
400ml boiling water (approx)

Directions -

Roast or grill the aubergine for approx 10 mins or until slightly brown.
Sweat the onions and garlic in a pan until soft.
Add tomatoes, spices, stock and bring to the boil for approx 5 mins.
Add the roasted aubergine and cook for a further 3-5 mins.
Blend with a stick blender.

(Serves - 2 - 128 calories approx)

Easy peasy, it tastes as good as Heinz soup I reckon and is probably better for you.



Saturday, 30 March 2013

Warning: explicit photo, lumps and the resurrection.

The we're back post may have been a little premature. But Kath did fully intend to post but she's a lazy cow is training for the London marathon and is spending most of her time in running hobbling, eating pizza, crying and getting sports massages from Boltonian students - which is more painful I believe than the running.

anticipating Kath at the end

It's not pretty to watch her try and sit down, she looks like a drunk backpacker trying to squat over a Thai floor toilet at a full moon party. Poor thing. She is nearly ready for the big day and I am sure you will join me is wishing her luck.

Maybe she will have a post in her after the event but in the mean time she just hasn't got enough time in the day.

As for me, well I have plans......alongside my cousin and maybe Kath I am hoping to compete in the Salford Triathlon in August.

My training has been on hold for a bit cause I was waiting to have my third boob removed from my shoulder. It wasn't technically a boob, but a lipoma and it needed to come out cause at some point it was likely going to grow arms and whisper "open your mind Quaid, open your mind".

For those of you with no filmic knowledge a full explanation is included in the video below (scroll to 1 min and 30 seconds , or just watch the whole film because it is truly epically amazing and Sharon Stone is so cool and looks the sh!t in her power suit).

Anyway, I have had the little sucker (Derek, I called him Derek) out now but I am now in the recovery phase and can't get going just yet.

But for those of you who like gratuitous things, here's a salacious scar shot.

Nothing like a sharpie marker to fill you full of confidence.

No, only joking - I will put that in another post for you sicko's if you promise to keep reading because at some point I am going to want some money out of you people.

We started this blog to raise more money for Moodswings for our first swim. Well now I need your money for something else. My Ma has been diagnosed with Motor Neurone Disease and I am proper pissed off about it. There isn't a cure but there could be so that my friends is why this blog is coming back alive.

This post is getting dangerously long so more on that later but for now I will leave Derek to say goodbye.

Say goodbye Derek..........


Love Sammy x

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